Life Through My Lens

I know breakthrough is coming, b y faith I see a miracle My God made me a promise, a nd it won't stop now ..  I haven't written anything in a long time, but here it goes. There is a shift happening .. mostly inside of me. Everything feels off, I'm not myself and I feel like I'm on the verge of a panic attack almost everyday. When it comes to our own issues and working inside our hearts, it hurts. I can say it really sucks right now. I've had some things pointed out to me that I need to work on. And it's mostly stuff I've known, but it's hindering me in my relationships, but its also hindering me from being at my full potential.  God honestly and genuinely wants whats best for us. Sometimes it's in our most painful and difficult seasons we see our biggest breakthroughs. It's not that he withholds us from something good, it's sometimes for our own sake until it's the right time. Fear holds us back. Fear gets in the way of things we desi...

Allow Me to introduce Myself again I'm the One that knew you before time began I've been waiting for you to let Me be your friend Everything you ever need is everything I am I have had little to say lately. I have fell silent with words unable to speak. God has been doing a lot over the past few months. And I wanted to share a little insight into it. Let me start with this .. God has had me in a season of newness. Everything has been out my comfort zone, bending and shaping me. It's been a hard season. When nothing makes sense and everything is circling around you. It's how diamonds are made, under pressure.  Let's go back a little to March. This was when God gave me the revelation of the power of the spoken word. I literally sang in my car and I felt the spirit of bondage fall off me. He has made me pray out loud to myself every morning before work and more recently I got my first acoustic guitar. I'm excited to finally learn to play and sing again. Lea...

Blessed to be a blessing. Sing until the miracle comes.  Some of the biggest lessons we learn are through difficult circumstances and our long suffering. Yes, we are made for suffering. And it only holds true to how we handle those realities. The truth is we all make mistakes. We all do things out of our emotions instead of bringing them to the One. We should be seeking counsel instead of going to social media. It only leads down the dark path of self destruction. We need to place our hope in the Creator and not in what we can't control. Redirect our thinking and realities. We all have our moments when we would rather kick and scream and throw something across the floor and other times when we can rest in Him.  Nothing changes by worrying about it. Instead we need to be praying about it. God has been really teaching me in this season about steadfast faith. And I mean real full out cry to the Lord prayers. To release that pain in spoken word and talk to Him about it. He kno...

I n Christ she is able to do infinitely more than she could ever even imagine.  Our imperfections will never override God's promises. Trusting Him with our deepest desires, our deepest hurts and our deepest understandings. My last blog was mainly about how God calmed my anxiety and how I felt led in worship. I can say I feel so much better and learning to be more comfortable in worship and hopefully God will lead me to open doors. I have been feeling the weight of being uncomfortable and wanting to just go. This past week I could have quit my job, moved out and just went somewhere. I'm tired of being stuck. I'm ready for change. Not just any change, but a good and healthy change. Those kind of changes aren't easy. It takes a lot of thought to think through your decisions. I want to live life to the fullest, and I miss being able to just go where ever He called me.  I've been in a preparation season for a long time. But good things take time. He is developing our...

I've seen You move the mountains, and I believe I'll see You do it again.  I'll be honest, the past few weeks have been nothing but a blur. There are strong holds there that need to be broken. My anxiety has been severely bad, I'm overthinking and I feel absolutely stressed. The greatest thing you can do is pray. Pray hard, powerful prayers. Never stop praying. Call on Him to be with you.  The other day I was in my car going to work, and I usually just sing worship songs in my head. But for some reason I actually began to sing aloud!! I have not sang in about fifteen years. It literally broken off strongholds and anxiety like a storm. I haven’t had peace like that in a long time. There is so much power in worship, proclaiming His name. Something always changes when I bless Your name.  There is a lot that has been awakening in my recently. I have felt 'asleep' in some ways and I didn't even realize it. I've lost my passion to do the things I am called...

Be still and know that I am God. If we quiet our minds and listen, He is always speaking. It was such a rad weekend with an amazing group of people. The group was well connected, I loved the girls I roomed with in the sugar shack, and even though we had a few delays with warmer tempts and the wind knocking the power out, it still lead to a good time on the slopes. I honestly really prayed for this trip. Since I was really sick last year, and some girl drama, I really wanted this trip to be unique and well processed. God out did it. I know being an introvert is hard in larger groups, it can be harder to be yourself, but I still enjoyed being around everyone and being involved.   I didn't get to go into town this time, but we did end up going to a Maple syrup farm and learned how they make it in Vermont, as well as cheese. It was really cold, but interesting. Then spent some time hanging out at the lodge. I was a bit disappointed in myself for not going on more runs. I know ...

Turning the tides. 2019 has been a rough start. I had two family members who passed away, my job is overwhelming, and I don't know where this year is going to lead. But I do have hope this will be a good year. God is moving, and He will bring breakthroughs and transitions into life. I'm praying that God will direct my steps to where to go next, and what I really need to do. It is time for change. It is time for things to happen in my life. I have been waiting for a long time, and I know I really want a boyfriend, and a better job, and a new car and so on. I know God can do it. God has already shown me so much already. There will always be conflict with people, but it's learning to lean on Him, and trust the process.

Raise a Hallelujah goodness of God, ain't no grave, victory is Yours!   I'm at a point in my life where I don't know who my friends are. And I don't mean I don't have great friends. The close friends I had in different seasons of life are living their own life and sometimes I don't see or talk to them for months or so. God said we are to guard our hearts at ALL times. And I mean in all relationships. The thing that God taught me is if your going from relationship to relationship your never actually healing. Your bringing the same hurt with you to the next person. Or never actually spending some time apart from a friend and do something by yourself. What I'm saying is what is not from God is doomed to fail, and we need to more self aware of our time, and working with God to restore those broken places of our hearts.  2019 is the end of a decade, and that also means letting go of the past and moving forward. I've had a few deaths in my family, my grand...