Trusting God, Work Ministry and True Faith.


"Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." -(Hebrews 11:1)

 Trusting God .. but what does that really look like. When we pray to God to answer our prayers it often does not look like what we want it to. And sometimes it turns out even better or not at all then what we prayed for. I will admit, I don't pray as much as I used to. I mean real full hearten prayers. I can say working full time is not what I wanted to see myself doing. Its been four years since I've been out of YWAM and God has had me home and it's been so hard. I hate growing up. I miss having the freedom to go wherever God calls you to, whenever, wherever. Being able to make plans and work around whatever you have going on. I don't have that freedom anymore. 

 I value my time so much. Not having the time to do what I want is stressing me out. Working 40 hours a week and trying to have a life at the same time, I don't know how anyone can do it! Adulting! I spend the majority of my time at work, with the same people everyday that I miss being with my friends. But don't get me wrong, God has been teaching me that work, yes work can be your ministry. My ideal of missions is going across country and over seas ministering to refugees, working with kids, prayer walks, fellowship, long bus rides, getting lost, ethnic foods, community. But sometimes it doesn't look like that at all. It CAN be right where you are. The thing God has been teaching is that all those experiences you have, can be used to enlighten others. 

 I'm a changed person. You are shaped by your experiences. There are always new things you are learning and can teach others. I love talking about my experiences abroad and all that God has done for me. God has been SO faithful in my life I can't even believe it sometimes. Through all the pain and heartache and never understanding what is going on half the time, God always comes through. I'm really going through a season of really trusting God that He will come through with some of my long over due prayers. Will God use this time of where I'm at now to help align me with a special someone .. or help me gain skills to move up in a job, or lead me to new opportunities. 

 I feel frustrated a lot because I read too much into things. Like, is this person single? or is he even interested in me? Will I ever move positions, or have the time so I can climb. My anxiety is through the roof a lot lately, and I need to pray for God to calm me down, and allow for God to work things out. Let Him do the work. It gives me some relief in thinking that way. 

 God has been transitioning me forward for awhile now, and it's been so hard to let go of that season into the unknown. Life does move really fast. And I need to slow down and realize that what is going in the moment will matter for what happens in the future. And relax, don't take life so seriously either. 









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