Life Through My Lens

What does it look like to just be .. to just be in His presence again. We grow soo used to being busy all the time we don't actually take the time for Him. God is a jealous God, and He wants all of our attention. He wants to get our attention back on Him. The enemy will do anything to distract us. And we need to be praying for discernment in the process.  Something was brought up to me the other night after church, what is the next? I was explaining how I went to college, did YWAM and now working full time, and I feel like my time following God is up. I'm in a different season of life now. And it sometimes involves giving up a lot in the process. But I'm not feeling fulfilled in what I am doing. I feel drained and tired all the time. I feel like I'm waiting for that next big thing to happen .. but what does that look like. God has grown me and changed me so much over the past few years that all that I have learned can be used in such significant ways. I'm an amazi...

There is rawness in the beauty.  Pressure makes diamonds. Everybody wants to be a diamond, but very few are willing to take the pressure and get cut. Water cuts through and erodes rock not by force, but with what it contains at a molecular level and with it's fierce persistence. Because nothing grows out of comfort zones. You have to be persistent in growing and stepping out in faith.   I can say, in a more recent sense, I have been a diamond under pressure surfacing over a lot of hard work and healing in my life. God is making me a diamond. A diamond that reflects Jesus and the victories in my life. It's not just diamonds, but when God is faithful, our lives will be fruitful. Each season of our lives He is constantly surfacing and molding us to be more like Him.  Remember that God meets you where you are at. Not where you have been, not where you are going, but right where you are. He takes all of our experiences and uses them to better ourselves. We are not produc...

I was driving in the car with my mom the other day and we started talking about all of our times in Delray Beach, FL and missing Atlantic Ave. and the inner coastal and watching the boats go by. It hit me that all those times are only memories now. We can't go back to what was once a reality. All the family dinners we used to have and the boat rides. Everything you do will become a memory. So why is it so hard to realize to live in the moment, but yet we always look ahead or behind.  Four years ago I would be graduating from DTS and leaving to come back to reality. So how did time go so fast. I always miss YWAM during the winter months. You don't always realize the memories you are creating and the memories you make with people. It always goes way too fast. We are all in different phases of life now, and life has never been the same since then. But I miss that season of life. When all I had to worry about was to live for Jesus for six months. And then all of that changed. Tim...

Because God is faithful, our lives will be fruitful. There are blessings in the waiting. We live in a culture where we want everything now. We want and want, but don't put in the effort for things to grow. Everything takes time. I'm not saying that if it's right, then go for it. Sometimes you just have to take a chance or that chance won't come again. But God's timing is perfect. He is never late or too early. We jump into relationships to soon and then end in devastating consequences. A relationship is one of the most important decisions of our lives, and we need to not be reckless with our hearts and of others.  In the Bible, everything took time. Jesus was thirty-three when He came to his ministry. There are other stories where it took until later in life to receive that blessing. But it's what we do in the waiting that matters. God can use that time for other things. I shouldn't feel left behind because I'm not married with two kids or have a dre...

One of the most powerful gifts God can give to you is your testimony. Believe it or not, I didn't grow up in the church. I went to various churches growing up, but it was only for Easter services and events. But I knew nothing about it other then religion. My parents were hurt from the church and chose to raise us without it. My parents divorced when I was young, and both remarried. I didn't come to know the Lord until I was 19. I was a freshmen at Penn State who was new and learning my way around and wanting to meet new people. My RA and few of the guys started this bible study in my hall. I still remember this to this day, but one night we all went out for a quick dinner and someone asked me what it is I believe in .. and I didn't know. So I started to go to the bible studies and something just clicked in me. I wanted to know more. I have never heard it like this before and especially from people my own age. But God knew something else was in store for me.  I rememb...

God has been teaching me a lot about discernment.  (in Christian contexts) perception in the absence of judgment with a view to obtaining spiritual direction and understanding. What it means is to ask God to give you confirmation over something, situations or direction. When you ask, He will answer. And most of the time you will know, or the answer will be given to you. It's not always what we want to know, but in asking Him about it, He will answer you.  I'm also learning to actively learn what it means to guard your heart. When you don't know something, guard your heart until God gives you confirmation over it. It means praying and praying, and trusting that God will give way.  Never put God in a box, the only one who is limiting Him is yourself. He is capable of doing so much, yet we tend to limit Him. I know I do. I feel like God is not able to come through on some things in my life. I get mad and frustrated. But am I limiting Him or am I- that I feel isola...

Kids club!! okay, so this has been sitting on my heart to write recently. I never really looked at all the time I've spent with children abroad. There is soo much they can teach you. I was a camp counselor at an English/Spanish camp in Madrid, Spain. Kids Club in Romania. University students, Syrian refugees and gypsy kids in Turkey. The orphanage at Robin's Nest in Jamaica. There is so much to embrace about all that it has taught me and how I can apply those lessons here.  There is one thing in common, children have it fairly good in America. When I was in Turkey, I did a day that I could meet children and mother's who have fled the war zone of Syria. It changed my life to actually meet these human beings. These children have no idea why they had to leave their country, and yet if they will ever return. They have family all over they are trying to get too. But yet they still found joy and happiness in the midst of it all. We did crafts and sang songs, and still was a...

I  attended a singles seminar with Debra Fileta, who is a relationships blogger and counselor. She talked through some hard truths, but also what it means to be a healthy person to have healthy relationships. Here are a few things she said: •Healthy people equal healthy relationships  •Set boundaries as a single person way before marriage •Be two whole people who don’t need each other, but rather choose to be with each other  •Choose someone who will get better with time  •Give and take, learn to communicate your feelings, interdependence  •Be spiritually equal, anything of value is worth protecting  Relationships are hard. We talk it up, to be something so much more then it is. That includes families, kids, relationships and marriage. Your feelings are vital and need to be able to talk about it. Learning to have a middle ground with personality differences. And really knowing who you are. Be in a healthy place as a single person. This is something ...

If there is one thing that we all feel, is the feeling of not being good enough. We are so absorbed for the feeling of self gratification that the second we sense a bit of rejection from someone we feel not good enough. It sometimes doesn't have to be what someone said, just body language or what they don't say. You read into it and think all these thoughts when maybe it was not intended that way. As a people pleaser it's so hard to not let people's rejections get to you. You want everyone to like you. You try so hard to not say or do anything wrong to offend someone. But there are going to be people that don't like you. And that's okay. The more you begin to realize we aren't mean't to please everyone, it makes life a little easier.  I hate to admit it, but I have been rejected by every guy I have ever liked. Each rejection has only made finding love more and more of a difficulty, and lose of hope that it will ever happen. You get angry and upset with...